I wanted to let nature take its course. Next most likely is that baby doesn't co-operate and they can't see some parts of anatomy and call you back 2 weeks later just because they couldn't see (i had this but because twin pregnancy I was due to be scanned 2 weeks later anyway). Parents get a chance to emotionally adapt to news and plan. Well, at the regional hospital it was a 3-D scan. And I felt like a murderer. It's, I mean you can't tell from these scans what you're looking at really, but I remember thinking, 'it just doesn't look quite right' or something, but I didn't give it much thought. Then, three days later, I would go to the labour ward - the ward I had been expecting to visit in two and a half months. This article was amended on 24 November 2015 to anonymise the writer. Everywhere you look, there are happy, fat, smug pregnant women. We didn't name him. All pregnant women should be given the booklet by their midwife or GP Screening tests for you and your baby by Public Health England, which gives detailed information about the types of scan offered and what they are looking for. He told me that they may want to do blood tests, but that 'he didn't see the point'. Spina bifida can usually be seen clearly on a scan and of those babies who have this condition, around 9 out of 10 (90%) will be detected. But he was wrong. 80 percent of my pregnancies have ended in death and I felt like they were telling me those babies didn't matter. So we left it there, and we didn't actually think that there was anything really to worry about after that scan. The clinic advised a follow up scan the week after, to check on progress and to see what to do next. For example, you may be offered further tests that have a risk of miscarriage. The baby was kicking so hard that I began to believe him. Forcing my hand to my mouth to take the tablet was probably the hardest thing I have ever done. It was, 'Oh we'll come back to that'. I pray it's just her heart but I can't see anything else is wrong as I have been scanned by a consultant since I was 14 weeks and every time he has said everything looks okay and she is growing consistently. He bluntly told me, he wasn't interested in whatever was seen before, he was only going to go by what he saw that day. And so began the most bizarre day of my life. I had to wait for a doctor to explain the situation. If necessary, you will be referred to a specialist, possibly in another hospital. Specialist scans had a powerful effect on some parents because they could see the baby more clearly and in some cases people recognised which parts of the baby's body were not working properly. Previous scans in this pregnancy and with my first child had been fun - a chance to see the baby wriggling around and perhaps find out its sex. I noticed the box of tissues on the table. I did think it was a bit strange that she wasn't talking, and then she sort of said, 'Oh, I think there's a problem. Some of the other conditions, such as heart defects, are more difficult to see. The rarest scenario is that the baby is severely ill and choices will need to be made. Mumsnet carries some affiliate marketing links, so if you buy something through our posts, we may get a small share of the sale (more details here). Has anyone been told the sex incorrectly at their 20 week scan? I couldn't work out what was taking so long and put it down to the doctor being young and inexperienced. The 18 -20 week fetal anomaly scan is a watershed in most pregnancies because for the majority of women it will be the last time they are scanned before giving birth. But for those few days they were torture. They said the brain was okay -, We were in there for a matter of minutes, literally -, In and out. And then, so I went to my next scan, which was the 20-week abnormality scan, and we took our first child with us, I think he was 17 months old at the time. I had to wait yet another sleepless night. The people who did know what was going on seemed far too sure that we were doing the right thing, that there was really no choice to be made. And even at that early stage it was beginning to sink in that there was something really not right. The blood test confirmed it was twins. But on, in the middle of March, 10th March it was, we had a 20 week scan. We were convinced everything would be OK. I went away and came back, and she couldn't get a good picture. Because we knew that that wasn't normal, that wasn't what we'd experienced before, it wasn't just the, 'There's the arm, there's the leg, oh look the baby's moving'. And thank God I did. At first the closeness came through a sense of guilt. I didn't think my instincts were worth much. We went, I went in to the scanning room and they're quite bland facially anyway, whether everything's fine or not they just look at the screen to start off with and do measurements but I very quickly realised that the woman's demeanour wasn't, even for a bland face, was concerning. Registered office: Nicholas House, 3 Laurence Pountney Hill, London, EC4R 0BB. So I suppose from that aspect, mind you having not been told that or sitting there, I wouldn't have thought necessarily that was odd. Has anyone been told the wrong sex at 20 week scan? We saw the consultant, who was reassuring, saying that he would rescan me and was sure everything would be fine. We had the baby cremated. But here I was, minutes later, lying down, waiting. So when that happened to us I really didn't worry, I thought, you know, it was literally the baby was in awkward position, they couldn't see the heart and that was why. So we went home really and I sort of had to think about it all night. When I told him what had happened, he refused to believe anything was wrong and said he'd sort it out when he came home. 'Soft markers'. See more information about the 20-week ultrasound scan. I know its hard- but i really wouldnt worry about it too much as the worry will stress you and your body out. Emma was 20 weeks' pregnant when a routine scan revealed that the baby she was expecting had Down's syndrome and heart problems. Not marginalised into being a victim. We left the hospital a couple of hours later. No, we really didn't, with hindsight we probably should have, but not at all, it never occurred to us to be worried about it. And I couldn't escape the feeling that I was being selfish. . And, sometimes, I wish I had invited my whole family into the hospital room to see him. The consultant showed us the letter with our result on and, yes, there were the words "Down's syndrome". I know I could have delivered him in a quarter of the time, but I couldn't bear the thought of him leaving me. Severe chromosomal conditions such as Edwards' syndrome are now often picked up in the first trimester antenatal screening but itwill usually be more obviousat the 18- 20 week scan, though usually a firm diagnosis will not be made until one or two specialists have weighed up all available evidence about the baby - which usually means that another expert needs to scan the baby again, or until the woman has had an amniocentesis. And that, that was when things where it started going a bit wrong. Some people we talked to had not had a 18-20-week scan, either because their babies' abnormalities had been detected by earlier . And you could see, where you should have a picture of 4 chambers, you could really see 2. The consultant had said it wouldn't be like a normal delivery. 1. I could hardly breathe. 17/12/2020 17:13. It seemed inconceivable that we would not be having a baby in May. Likely to have serious medical problems all his life. It is extremely rare for these pregnancies to reach term as they typically spontaneously miscarry early in pregnancy. As I was called for my scan I was nervous and emotional. Try to relax and take it easy. My partner went out with him, wanting to see him. Just that really! The same anxious wait for a little, pathetic cry. And again, you know, you read all the books and it tells you 'this is the diagnostics', but after a while you don't hear that inside your head any more No, no, no, I'm fine - because everything's perfect. She just said, 'It's a bit short, it needs to be checked' again basically. The doctor wanted to do another blood test to confirm a significant drop in my hormone levels. I was told they needed to do a blood test to get a bench mark of my hormone levels. So at least then we went to that next stage prepared for the worst really. Let a mum know you're thinking of them send one of our personalised Mother's Day cards today, Home But he was not sure. Others said they were shocked because all the early diagnostic tests (e.g. Health professionals use the 18-20 week scan to examine the baby's size and position, and also to check if his/her brain, heart, lungs and other internal organs are developing as expected. But it is a soft marker for Edwards' syndrome. It was far too much power; neither of us wanted it. So I sort of went home quite, fairly kind of happy and I, at, at this point I hadn't any idea things could go wrong anyway. I know it sounds odd that you want to hear that it's wrong, but you, you know it's wrong, and you, you want to be reassured either that it's okay or is there something seriously wrong. I couldn't have the added responsibility for changing his mind. And they, sort of two of them were looking at the scan machine and then they sort of switched everything off and said, 'Oh, I think we have, might have a problem'. And you know, we were laughing and joking. On January 18, my baby was born, at 23 weeks - a little boy. Unfortunately I was not met with a compassionate sonographer. After she had taken all the measurements, the sonographer told us that she was concerned with the length of the baby's limbs in relation to the head. I mean, you just, you're just overwhelmed, it's so much fun. This scan takes place between 18 weeks and 20 weeks 6 days of pregnancy and is commonly called the 20-week scan. Several women had taken young children with them to the 20-week scan because they expected to see 'nice pictures of the baby'. I guess the morphine made it easier. On the third day, we got a phone call. You have accepted additional cookies. To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account. The "why me?" It can be such a shock so do whatever you need to feel better. Hugely upset that to think that the baby was so poorly. I couldn't bear to see the baby and asked the midwife to take him away immediately. Anyway we went in for the meeting with the consultant on this particular time, and we'd got to, I was 30 weeks pregnant by then. And so this one can't tell you anything, it's pictures, you're going, you're going to see your baby, you're going to get pictures. The following is a quote from their report: If the scan reveals either a suspected or confirmed abnormality, the woman should be informed by the sonographer at the time of the scan. I just feel very unlucky. She didn't say at the time that it was a major problem or that it was something to watch out for. I wasn't ready to make a decision straight away, and I was told I could call them in the morning. The 18 -20 week fetal anomaly scan is a watershed in most pregnancies because for the majority of women it will be the last time they are scanned before giving birth. Most hospitals do not allow children to attend scans as childcare is not usually available. You've had, you've had your Down's Syndrome check and that's okay. I did. And of course some other measurements she needed to take like the width of the skull, which she couldn't take because the fetus was in the wrong position. Wed like to set additional cookies to understand how you use GOV.UK, remember your settings and improve government services. I was experiencing some light bleeding for the past few days. The scan will find about half (50%) of those babies who have heart defects. Not surprisingly, people aren't quite sure how to deal with me. The termination would be averting a tragedy. Sometimes women were told that the sonographer had found a 'marker' or sign of a chromosomal condition and had to wait for an amniocentesis to confirm the findings. She wanted to have a look at the skull, which was the main thing, but she couldn't see it from where the baby was. We both thought we would like some good to come out of this horrible experience, so wanted to talk to somebody about the possibility of using the body for research purposes. 18-20 week scans provide clinicians with more information than earlier scans because by18 weeks a healthy baby should be larger and better developed. Can you describe the difference between the scan at this later stage in a pregnancy? And nothing prepares you at all. Finally, Monday came and we went back to the hospital. Why me and not you, you bastard? I think it's the same - in fact I think it was probably the same room, same consultant - and [sighs] I suppose it felt upsetting because at the dating scan you're full of hope and this scan we knew wasn't going to be good, we knew it was maybe the last time we would see the baby moving around. In this information, the word we refers to the NHS service that provides screening. You will then be asked to raise your top to your chest and lower your skirt or trousers to your hips. Mumsnet carries some affiliate marketing links, so if you buy something through our posts, we may get a small share of the sale (more details here). By 7pm, I still hadn't delivered the baby. No discussion, no quiet contemplation. And before they gave me any of the results she asked a colleague to come and told me she wanted to check something, with a colleague, and by then I was getting very concerned because I'd never had that happen before. And at the end of the day however much we talked about it - that it was going to be the two of us to make the decision and me to actually you know, go through it and decide that that was what was going to happen for him - and I just, I didn't want to do it. What happens at the second midwife appointment? We don't know, but it's not looking good'. But worse was to come. During the examination, sonographers need to keep the screen in a position that gives them a good view of your baby. I have a terrible hatred of pregnant women and a new respect for infertile couples. The 18-20 week antenatal scan and further tests. The first words I said were: "If there's anything wrong then it's my fault", I had been working 70, nearly 80 hours the previous weeks and pushed myself hard. A few people recalled how frightened and alarmed they became when they sensed that the atmosphere in the scanning room changed in an instant from 'jokey' to serious when the baby's problems were detected. So we decided to book an early 10 week private scan. He felt doing more blood tests would only cause me more discomfort and false hope. I feel empty and incomplete. I've still had no cramps or bleeding so fingers crossed everything is ok I just couldn't believe I fell down the stairs, I can't remember the last time I ever did that! And that was extraordinary to see the detail that that could offer. I don't know how we got through the next couple of days. It would have been nice to see someone straight away because I was in such shock. The same unique expression he had when he saw our two year old born. She asked me how far gone I thought we were, and if I could have been mistaken.
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